Today’s Gag

October 19, 2014

Rick-BlogTo purchase reprint and/or other rights for this cartoon, buy a framed print, or have it reproduced on T-shirts, mugs, aprons, etc., visit my archives at cartoonstock.com and jantoo.com by clicking the sidebar links.

Copyright © 2014 Jim Sizemore.

Scenic Graffiti III

October 12, 2014

I’m often in the Virginia mountains this time of year, on my way to visit relatives in Covington, near the West Virginia line. Following the two-lane Rt. 32 West, which runs from Lexington, Va., through Goshen Pass, on the way to Warm Springs, I pulled off as usual at the waist-high stone wall overlooking the Maury River, some 80 feet below. The view there is beautiful, but it’s hard to photograph scenic images without resorting to visual cliché. So when I visit this spot, rather than feature the natural beauty, I like to foreground the graffiti. New scribbles are added all the time. It has been three or four years since my last visit, so another update is in order. Same place, third time, fresh doodling. (To view the two earlier posts, just type “graffiti” in the window to the right and tap “search,” then scroll down a bit. To make it worth your while, the original post even ends with a little graffiti “punchline.”)

(Click images for larger views.)

lzGraffiti590

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Copyright © 2009 Jim Sizemore.

The Music Scene

October 2, 2014

Screaming Females performing at the Bowery BallroomMarissa Paternoster, prone, prodigiously shooting shards of skronk out to the audience (Baltimore City Paper 10/1/14)

I sent this note to the Music Editor at City Paper: “In the photo Ms. Paternoster is ‘supine’ (on her back). If she were ‘prone,’ as the caption has it, she’d be playing her guitar face-down on the floor. Difficult, to say the least . . .”

The only reason I know this is that many, many years’ ago, during army basic training, I qualified on the M-1 rifle range from the “prone” (belly down) position. But I’m ‘way out of touch in this modern music world. Can someone please tell me what the word “skronk” means?

Today’s Poem

October 1, 2014
Holmes2Oliver Wendell Holmes, 1841-1935

Cacoëthes Scribendi

(An itch for scribbling.)

 If all the trees in all the woods were men,

And each and every blade of grass a pen;

If every leaf on every shrub and tree

Turned to a sheet of foolscap; every sea

Were changed to ink, and all earth’s living tribes

Had nothing else to do but act as scribes,

And for ten thousand ages, day and night,

The human race should write, and write, and write,

Till all the pens and paper were used up,

And the huge inkstand was an empty cup,

Still would the scribblers clustered round its brink

Call for more pens, more paper, and more ink.

Oliver Wendell Holmes

—The Oxford Book of Comic Verse

Edited by John Gross


Today’s Gag

September 25, 2014

1409-Quarter-BlogTo purchase reprint and/or other rights for this cartoon, buy a framed print, or have it reproduced on T-shirts, mugs, aprons, etc., visit my archives at cartoonstock.com and jantoo.com by clicking the sidebar links.

Copyright © 2014 Jim Sizemore.

Hip Shots

September 19, 2014

Windows

By Catherine Bruce

(Click images for larger views.)

Window9470

Window9471

Window9467

The “Hip Shots” series of photographs will feature images that were grabbed “on the fly,” with little or no regard for framing and focus. The object of the exercise is to create dynamic pictures, not perfect ones. With this ” shoot-from-the-hip” method, the more frames exposed the better the chances are that you’ll come up with something interesting — a related series that may be arranged as a post. If you’d like additional tips for using the technique, or to submit your own images, drop a question or note in the “Leave a Comment” section, below.

Copyright © 2014 Catherine Bruce.

Today’s Poems

September 14, 2014

Gavin_EwartGavin Ewart, 1916-1995

The Black Box

As well as these poor poems

I am writing some wonderful ones.

They are all being filed separately,

nobody sees them.

When I die they will be buried

in a big black tin box.

In fifty years’ time

they must be dug up,

for so my will provides.

This is to confound the critics

and teach everybody

a valuable lesson.

‘It’s Hard to Dislike Ewart’

—New Review critic

I ALWAYS try to dislike my poets,

it’s  good for them, they get so uppity otherwise,

going around thinking they’re little geniuses—

but sometimes I find it hard. They’re so pathetic

in their efforts to be liked.

WHEN WE’RE all out walking on the cliffs

it’s always pulling my coat with ‘Sir! Oh, Sir!’

and ‘May I walk with you, Sir?’—

I sort them out harshly with my stick.

IF I PUSH a few over the edge, that only

encourages the others. In the places of preferment

there is room for just so many.

The rest must simply lump it.

There’s too much sucking up and trying to be clever.

They must all learn they’ll never get round me

Merit has nothing to do with it. There’s no way

to pull the wool over my eyes, no way,

no way . . .

By Gavin Ewart

—The Oxford Book of Comic Verse

Edited by John Gross


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