Prose Styles Gone Wild, #1

This headed the menu at Richard’s Restaurant in Baltimore, 1983.

RICHARD’S MISSION

Our mission is a simple one. To Please your palate and to sooth you aesthetically. To make the drinking and dining experience singularly pleasurable to you and your friends as well as those you send to us. If we do not, you must let us know and know why. Remember, it is you, our client, whom it is felt by us, one and all, that on account of you, pay the bill, hence, therefore, you are only the most primary important and very gorgeous person with whom we do business.

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2 Responses to Prose Styles Gone Wild, #1

  1. Florence says:

    I.e., “Welcome to our restaurant. We hope you enjoy your meal.”

  2. Jim says:

    Indeed. You’re in good hands. Right . . .

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